Humorous answers to the question “How are you?” Probably the most common greeting anywhere, with friends, with family, or even at work. The usual reply, of course, would be a simple “I’m fine, thank you” but where’s the fun in that? If you are tired of the same boring responses, why not have a little more fun? Coming up with a humorous reply can add just enough lightheartedness to any conversation and make you unforgettable. Below, we “How are you?” will find some interesting and creative responses for Which can bring a smile to anyone’s face.

Over-the-top Reactions

When asked “How are you?”, one of the ways to catch them off guard is through a highly exaggerated answer. You can say:

“I have lived on substantial and sheer determination.”

“I’m planning world domination. How about you?”

“Oh, I am just on a roller coaster of emotions without a safety bar.”

These responses really work wonders when one intends to introduce a bit of humor into an otherwise mundane day or lighten the mood in any social setting. They add a twist to the norm and give one an interesting persona.

Lively Self-Deprecation

If you are okay with a little bit of self-deprecating humor, this is a great way to disarm the other person and get them to laugh. Try saying something like:

“I’m somewhere between awesome and a complete mess. How about you?”

“Just like a broken printer-everything is jammed and nothing is printing properly.”

“I’m on my third coffee of the day, so on a scale of one to ten, I’m probably an eight.”

These answers are most effective if you know the person relatively well, as they imply a comfort level and familiarity in the interaction. Still, it is important to adjust for context. In a business setting, for example, the use of self-effacing humor may not be an effective style.

Abstract and philosophical response

Those who enjoy surprising a person pull off a bombshell of an answer, which can be hilarious and astonishing, something profound and philosophical:

 “Does anybody really know how they are?”

“I am what I am, and that’s all what I am.”

“I am experiencing the human condition, one moment at a time.”

These type of responses work fabulous whenever you are in the mood to perplex someone but not without entertaining them. This gives a completely different spin to the usual banter, as it leaves people agog or scratching their heads.

Sarcastic response

Then there’s sarcasm, of course-classic humor, but once again, it has to be done with care. One wisecrack comment thrown in with a little sarcasm can take any conversation from bland to grand in a trice:

“Oh, I’m just living the dream. And by ‘dream,’ I mean ‘mild chaos.”

“If I was better, the vitamins would be taking me.”

“I’m better than yesterday but not as good as I will be tomorrow.”

These will make you funny and edgy, but be aware of the receiver’s sense of humor. Not everyone takes sarcasm well, especially at a workplace.

Movie or TV quote

Quoting any line from a famous movie or TV show gives an instant pop culture twist on your answer:

“I am like Dory from Finding Nemo: just keep swimming, keep swimming!”

“Well, to quote Joey from friends: ‘I’m fine!'”

“Like a character from The Office: weird, but still here.”

Such responses will really work in the case when you’re sure that another person shares your interest for some series or movie. That may bring just one point of mutual recognition and even begin a long conversation about your favorite scenes or characters.

Completely random response

For those of you that love the spontaneity and randomness, having absolutely no relation to your question can be quite humorous:

“I’m currently on a quest to find the best taco in town”

“I recently decided to become a pirate. How’s it going? Errr!”

“I’m like a squirrel in traffic: a little confused but just going with it”

These are quite out-of-the-box answers and are more than capable of bringing a smile. They are optimal when the sole intention is to ice-break or leave an impression.

The “dad joke” way

Who doesn’t love a good dad joke? These responses are often punitive and can be hilariously cringe-worthy:

“I’m like butter: on a roll.”

“I’m like a kangaroo: bouncing back!”

“I’d tell you, but then you’d be too nice like me, and we can’t have that.”

Where the dad jokes might not be for everyone, they often work in a light-hearted atmosphere where a cheesy quip can bring some genuine laughs.

“How are you” reversed

Other quick-witted responses are those which immediately turn the tables back on the person asking:

“You first. How are you?”

“Depends-what do you think I am?”

“How am I? Well, how much time do you have?”

This turns the question to the other party and is far more intriguing than the ‘hello, nice weather’ type greeting.

The Nerdish Reply

For those who spend hours in the virtual world or in the computer business, responding with something about computers can be both amusing and to the point:

“I’m like Wi-Fi: sometimes up, sometimes down, but mostly just buffering.”

“Running on 50% battery, but still online!”

“I’d say I’m between ‘404 error’ and ‘200 OK’.”

These responses will be especially in a geeky office environment or among people who understand the peculiarities of such humor.

Author’s response

An example of when the literal understanding of the question gives a very funny misunderstanding:

“Well, my blood pressure is 80 to 120, great.”

“I am alive, breathing, and have a beating heart-so I guess it’s a win.”

“I’m currently operating within acceptable parameters, thank you.”

These responses sometimes give the conversation a completely new turn and keep it going.

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conclude

“How are you?” responses of any kind. Your toolkit in communication can lighten everyday communication and make it fun. Humor-possibly the easiest way to connect with people, lighten up a situation, and leave an indelible mark. Whether it be sarcasm, randomness, dad jokes, or even philosophical sayings-depending on the audience is the key to such a response.

So, the next time anyone asks you, “How are you?”, don’t just say “I’m fine.” Give them an answer that they will surely remember, and perhaps even be snickering about for days afterward.